Re: Vaccinations
Posted: Mon Jan 18, 2016 8:35 pm
Eloisa and Lena,
Your alls feedback has pushed me to be more sincere. I've really started the process of intellectually and emotionally trying to recognize, feel the sin of, and begin to challenge some of my addictions more sincerely. I've been going through the assistance group material, which I recommend to all. In addition, I've been more sincere about being humble and have recognized that I've been selective (don't want to feel through my tantrums and anger toward God, lack of faith, feelings of hopelessness, etc., -even though they are only false beliefs) in my emotional processing, when I originally thought I was being humble to all emotions. Furthermore, your feedback has assisted me in exploring more about some issues with my mom growing up, women, and feelings (addictions) of wanting to be saved, reassured, and validated for my struggles and effort.
I find it really important to have the moderators and others who are willing to be really honest with us about our addictions and others issues that prevent us from progressing. I remember when I first came across DT teachings and felt like Jesus was harsh and very confronting. Of course he didn’t meet my addictions of wanting to be approved of and validated and that is why I had the emotional reaction. I now come to see how it is loving and necessary for many of us. Honestly it has been absolutely necessary for me to be confronted and challenged. I hope this continues as I know I will probably need it again at some point, though am building my will to be more sincere and humble.
Elvira,
Thanks for your feedback and insights of your own. I can see how strongly my lack of faith (in myself and God) is being acted out especially when it comes to trying to do “what is best” for my family. When it comes to my children’s health and well-being I am so resistant to experimenting with having faith in God and God’s laws. I have many justifications about this, one of which being that until I have faith in myself, God, and God’s laws I am unwilling to risk “doing the wrong thing” when it comes to my children. However, I also am recognizing that what I think is the “right thing” is actually me avoiding my own feelings and therefore perpetuating the unloving behavior and the effects it is having on my children.
An example of this is a situation with my three year old son. He has had constipation issues from very early on and has now developed functional fecal retention where he holds his poop (up to five or six days at a time before he goes again) due to previous experiences when it really hurt and was traumatic for him. Mainstream medicine (our pediatrician) suggest to give him Mirilax (stool softener) that is designed for adults and has been linked to some potentially damaging issues later on in life. My wife and I have tried everything it feels like to not use this and have had some success with magnesium, diet, and other strategies, though he continues to have the same issue. If he doesn’t have a stool softener he will hold his poop and then have another traumatic painful bowel movement (BM). If this issue continues he could potentially develop a condition where his bowel will get stretched and will eventually result in leaking of the stool.
I’ve really been feeling about this issue and have been practicing feeling everything that comes up (or at least I think I am). For example, in my earlier post about vaccinations these issues have resulted in feeling angry, hopeless, helpless/powerless, scared for his health, etc. It seems to not be changing anything. Since spending more time looking at my addictions and learning how to challenge them I came to the realization that my wife and I have been avoiding our emotions by frantically at times pushing stool softeners, diet, liquids, encouraging him to push, etc. etc.. This is where I’m stuck. If I don’t give him stuff to keep his stool soft he will be re-traumatized (per our experience) and it will result in this issue perpetuating. However, I know that these strategies are my addiction to avoid my feelings. At this point I’m unwilling to challenge these addictions completely (can challenge some aspects of this like not frantically pushing him to drink or eat certain things, though will probably continue stool softeners-magnesium and/or mirilax if necessary) for fear of him and us being re-traumatized again by him holding it for almost a week and then having a really painful BM, which starts the cycle all over again.
This is one of those issues that is very painful for me. I understand that my wife’s and I’s unresolved emotional issues and unwillingness to be humble have led to my son developing this condition and not being able to have it resolved. I feel so much pressure to figure it out and address our issues to prevent from this issue from progressing. I feel I’ve been more sincere about emotionally processing about this and see no real law of attraction changes and actually recently have seen an increase in the issue getting worse so I know I’m not getting to any causal emotions and am probably caught up in an emotional addiction of some kind. I also think that to really face our emotions we will have to give up on our addictions (i.e., stool softener, and other strategies to help him poop regularly and without pain), though again cannot come to take that chance with my son’s condition as I don’t feel it loving to do until I have more faith and see some proof that what I’m doing is actually helping. I don’t want him to go through more trauma because we took this chance and were not humble enough to address the causal emotions that fuel this issue for him. I think that many parents probably have similar feelings and justifications for not challenging some of their addictions when it comes to their children’s/family’s health.
Any feedback or suggestions are welcomed.
Your alls feedback has pushed me to be more sincere. I've really started the process of intellectually and emotionally trying to recognize, feel the sin of, and begin to challenge some of my addictions more sincerely. I've been going through the assistance group material, which I recommend to all. In addition, I've been more sincere about being humble and have recognized that I've been selective (don't want to feel through my tantrums and anger toward God, lack of faith, feelings of hopelessness, etc., -even though they are only false beliefs) in my emotional processing, when I originally thought I was being humble to all emotions. Furthermore, your feedback has assisted me in exploring more about some issues with my mom growing up, women, and feelings (addictions) of wanting to be saved, reassured, and validated for my struggles and effort.
I find it really important to have the moderators and others who are willing to be really honest with us about our addictions and others issues that prevent us from progressing. I remember when I first came across DT teachings and felt like Jesus was harsh and very confronting. Of course he didn’t meet my addictions of wanting to be approved of and validated and that is why I had the emotional reaction. I now come to see how it is loving and necessary for many of us. Honestly it has been absolutely necessary for me to be confronted and challenged. I hope this continues as I know I will probably need it again at some point, though am building my will to be more sincere and humble.
Elvira,
Thanks for your feedback and insights of your own. I can see how strongly my lack of faith (in myself and God) is being acted out especially when it comes to trying to do “what is best” for my family. When it comes to my children’s health and well-being I am so resistant to experimenting with having faith in God and God’s laws. I have many justifications about this, one of which being that until I have faith in myself, God, and God’s laws I am unwilling to risk “doing the wrong thing” when it comes to my children. However, I also am recognizing that what I think is the “right thing” is actually me avoiding my own feelings and therefore perpetuating the unloving behavior and the effects it is having on my children.
An example of this is a situation with my three year old son. He has had constipation issues from very early on and has now developed functional fecal retention where he holds his poop (up to five or six days at a time before he goes again) due to previous experiences when it really hurt and was traumatic for him. Mainstream medicine (our pediatrician) suggest to give him Mirilax (stool softener) that is designed for adults and has been linked to some potentially damaging issues later on in life. My wife and I have tried everything it feels like to not use this and have had some success with magnesium, diet, and other strategies, though he continues to have the same issue. If he doesn’t have a stool softener he will hold his poop and then have another traumatic painful bowel movement (BM). If this issue continues he could potentially develop a condition where his bowel will get stretched and will eventually result in leaking of the stool.
I’ve really been feeling about this issue and have been practicing feeling everything that comes up (or at least I think I am). For example, in my earlier post about vaccinations these issues have resulted in feeling angry, hopeless, helpless/powerless, scared for his health, etc. It seems to not be changing anything. Since spending more time looking at my addictions and learning how to challenge them I came to the realization that my wife and I have been avoiding our emotions by frantically at times pushing stool softeners, diet, liquids, encouraging him to push, etc. etc.. This is where I’m stuck. If I don’t give him stuff to keep his stool soft he will be re-traumatized (per our experience) and it will result in this issue perpetuating. However, I know that these strategies are my addiction to avoid my feelings. At this point I’m unwilling to challenge these addictions completely (can challenge some aspects of this like not frantically pushing him to drink or eat certain things, though will probably continue stool softeners-magnesium and/or mirilax if necessary) for fear of him and us being re-traumatized again by him holding it for almost a week and then having a really painful BM, which starts the cycle all over again.
This is one of those issues that is very painful for me. I understand that my wife’s and I’s unresolved emotional issues and unwillingness to be humble have led to my son developing this condition and not being able to have it resolved. I feel so much pressure to figure it out and address our issues to prevent from this issue from progressing. I feel I’ve been more sincere about emotionally processing about this and see no real law of attraction changes and actually recently have seen an increase in the issue getting worse so I know I’m not getting to any causal emotions and am probably caught up in an emotional addiction of some kind. I also think that to really face our emotions we will have to give up on our addictions (i.e., stool softener, and other strategies to help him poop regularly and without pain), though again cannot come to take that chance with my son’s condition as I don’t feel it loving to do until I have more faith and see some proof that what I’m doing is actually helping. I don’t want him to go through more trauma because we took this chance and were not humble enough to address the causal emotions that fuel this issue for him. I think that many parents probably have similar feelings and justifications for not challenging some of their addictions when it comes to their children’s/family’s health.
Any feedback or suggestions are welcomed.