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Posted: Wed Aug 03, 2016 11:14 pm
This thing circling my conscious thoughts, it feels horrible, I wish it for my main course now.
Feels.like bloated, heart pain, 2 Dimensions, squeezing, path is always smaller, I'm perceiving the path too small, I won't fit, I dont want to be born, I don't want to know myself, I've changed my mind about being born, I will deny myself....
God says, discover myself. Man did not create the world in which you are born, I did. I need not act nor react. Allow myself to feel what remains. There is being and then was less, now then was more, now is now and now for more and then is more, forevermore!
Re: Hi God
Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2016 3:21 pm
This thread that you have created feels addictive to me.
The reason why I feel this is the case is because there are no questions you ask in your thread nor is there any real opening for anyone else to engage and discuss the topic of prayer further. It seems you are sharing a "prayer" that you have formulated. In terms of self reflection, it may be a good idea to ask myself what is going on inside of me to share with others something that is designed to be between myself and God and why I would engage in sharing something that may not have much benefit to others on the forum to help with their and/or my own understanding and experiments with prayer.
After receiving recent feedback from Mary myself regarding some of my own sharing with others about God (revolving around the injury of arrogance), it is something I am slowly becoming more aware of and I felt I could recognise something similar going on with you here.
Re: Hi God
Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 2:20 pm
Thanks nicky for the comment. The post was an intellectual translation of me going through a feeling. My adiction was to supress it. It got to much so I wanted to document my observation. The point is that going through a process will not always make sence untill the end. Then it's gone. When it goes it's difficult to remember what it was in the first place. It is what it is. I didn't further supress it by say Fearing I'm being silly by typing something that doesn't make sence. Thinking metaphorically allows me to not need to intervene intellectually when I'm processing feelings or emotions. It's a show and tell really. An unconventional word art.
Re: Hi God
Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2016 5:23 pm
In light of your feedback nicky, I'll look into my post further.
Re: Hi God
Posted: Mon Aug 08, 2016 9:52 pm
I remember a time when i was really young, before i started school. I went digging in the garden and found that if i add water to the dirt, it was easier to remove, to make a hole in the garden. i don't recall the approximate measurements. I do recall the experience because i felt a change. It is arrogant for me to be telling anyone this? I cant feel whether it is or whether it is not. If someone is on the forum and had never dug a hole, would they perceive my post as arrogance because i'm presenting information about a change but it is perceived that i'm saying i know more about digging a hole then they do. I don't know. I too would like to be aware of this. Or maybe its arrogance because i feel there are two points of view where as someone might only see one point of view and maybe i'm posting that as an injury of arrogance. That can escillate quite easily with an incorrect perception.
for me to ask a question in any language in an abstract written word can only be answered in the same way, depending on what i ask. I found that by praying metaphorically, ie feeling and whatever comes into my head then is my best explanation but it makes no sense. I have no way to intellectually block what doesn't make sense to me, but i can feel a change. In hindsight, actions change under different situations i find myself in afterwards.
So any question i ask in that regard will always be perceived as an addiction because i'm taking an intellectual action. I have learned here that intellectual actions on my part are taking over from feeling actions. I cant seem to do both at the same time. This has only come to light as i have written this, since your post, about my post. So my prayer has been answered? I couldn't have known what you were going to reply or even that you were going to reply, or what i would reply in turn. I can't have known this surely. I don't feel there is anything else to say.
If this is in addiction then it must be locked. If not, might it be left open and see in no definite time if someone else engages? (yet again it could be perceived as arrogance to suggest this)
Re: Hi God
Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2016 3:35 pm
I am locking this thread.