Denial, self deception and cancer
Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2016 11:51 pm
Hi guys,
I have been writing a blog for the past couple of years and recently made my first vlog... initially it was I started to record it just as a tool for myself, but after a couple of weeks reflecting and feeling through some fear about sharing it I decided to publish it. It is very raw and rough, but I hoped it would help those who continue to resist truth, like I have, to see the extent we can go to and the harm it does. I am still reflecting on my sins and emotions in relation to the the cancer I have had in the last year, and I would love to say "I got cancer and immediately felt the truth and emotions about it", but that is not what happened. In fact, Jesus says that every person he has advised about their cancer has been completely resistive to truth. This of course freaked me out when I heard this last year and told myself at the time I would change that - then immediately buried my head in the sand, that I was not facing personal truth, or if I was it was a smidgen of intellectual truth. It is only very recently I have started to feel a shift in me and I have a long, long way to go, but I do feel more desire and started to see the excuses I have had for not doing the Way. I have, like many of you, been talking the talk ( using my intellect is in fact one of my addictions) and not walking the walk.
It may seem like a long, long walk, but I figure if I don't even start it I am just going to spend the rest of my days staring at the path and in fact even forgetting it is there. I am fortunate than most people with cancer - I have come across DT teachings and I have an opportunity that most have not right now. I am grateful for this ( and challenged!) and I am also grateful for the Robert James Lee books which are giving me an education in love and God that astounds me and is helping me put my foot forward...
The video is about an hour and if you chose to listen I hope it helps in some way.
https://thetruthofitall.co.uk/
Maxine
I have been writing a blog for the past couple of years and recently made my first vlog... initially it was I started to record it just as a tool for myself, but after a couple of weeks reflecting and feeling through some fear about sharing it I decided to publish it. It is very raw and rough, but I hoped it would help those who continue to resist truth, like I have, to see the extent we can go to and the harm it does. I am still reflecting on my sins and emotions in relation to the the cancer I have had in the last year, and I would love to say "I got cancer and immediately felt the truth and emotions about it", but that is not what happened. In fact, Jesus says that every person he has advised about their cancer has been completely resistive to truth. This of course freaked me out when I heard this last year and told myself at the time I would change that - then immediately buried my head in the sand, that I was not facing personal truth, or if I was it was a smidgen of intellectual truth. It is only very recently I have started to feel a shift in me and I have a long, long way to go, but I do feel more desire and started to see the excuses I have had for not doing the Way. I have, like many of you, been talking the talk ( using my intellect is in fact one of my addictions) and not walking the walk.
It may seem like a long, long walk, but I figure if I don't even start it I am just going to spend the rest of my days staring at the path and in fact even forgetting it is there. I am fortunate than most people with cancer - I have come across DT teachings and I have an opportunity that most have not right now. I am grateful for this ( and challenged!) and I am also grateful for the Robert James Lee books which are giving me an education in love and God that astounds me and is helping me put my foot forward...
The video is about an hour and if you chose to listen I hope it helps in some way.
https://thetruthofitall.co.uk/
Maxine