Hello from Cari in the US

[Cari M]

Good day!

Just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. My name is Cari and I recently retired from the military here in the US after 26 years.
I bought a small home in Western North Carolina and have been spending time here since June 2015 trying to figure out who I really am.

I have been working on preparing for this time for almost the last 4 years, but little did I know how much I would learn when I found Divine Truth, which happened almost immediately after I moved here. I knew that I had a lot of suppressed emotions just from being in the military for a start and that I needed to deal with that ASAP. So I went on YouTube and did a search on suppressed emotions and Divine Truth came right up. Thankfully I am a pretty open minded person and look to glean information from just about any source and kept pressing even after I saw where AJ was saying that he is Jesus. I am so glad that I did. Honestly, I have so many things coming up all at once that I can hardly figure where to turn first so AJ and Mary, I haven't gotten to feeling about that yet, but I send you both my love nonetheless and am very grateful for everything that you are doing for us, especially sharing the recordings of your talks for those of us that are not able to make it at this time.

Just over a year ago I left a church that was teaching deliverance....casting out spirits in Jesus name, speaking to them in an unloving manner, etc. So thankfully the idea of spirits being real was nothing new. I am really glad to know that they are actually people now and have the opportunity to repent for the way that I have acted towards these spirits. But this has put a huge block in my way because I don't trust any spirits now, because I was taught they were all evil. Even now they know everything and can latch onto me in my unhealed areas and do or say almost anything....I really would like some help from them with trying to get into all these suppressed emotions, but this may be one of the biggest blocks that I have....it is very challenging to say the least as I am sure that all of you are already aware of.

Thank you for allowing me to join the forum! It is great to be able to reach out to others now as well. Are there any folks on here from the US?

Have a great day everyone!

Cari

[Nicky]

Hi Cari

Welcome to the forum. I feel many people on the path to God have some experience and frustrations with attempting to remove blocks to suppressed emotions. It seems you are in a great place to develop yourself and grow on the path (which I feel your spirit guides probably helped you with coming to those arrangements, which may seem rather weird to you at present).

I hope you can benefit from your time here and it's nice to meet you.

Nicky

[Teresa French]

Hi Cari,
It's nice to meet you, welcome!
I too am ex military, and while I didn't spend as much time in as you did, I also have repressed emotions (which was part of the reason why I joined the military in the first place).
With regards to spirits, there are a few books which are helpful on the divine truth site. The "Through the Mists" series is an excellent start - a great primer into the spirit world, and Mary and later in Jesus did a bookgroup study on the first book in the series (They are just about to start the second book - The Life Elysian - in the series in the next day or so).
There are a few other books which are recommended or suggested as well, in particular I liked "30 years among the dead" - This book was the one that really cemented my feeling that spirits were "just people" - the accounts were down to earth, literally, and did not give any mysticism to the spirits mentioned in the book, and I really had the feeling that they could have been people I knew now. (interesting writing that... shows me that I don't fully have that feeling! noted )
You can find the RJ Lees trilogy and 30 years among the dead on the divine truth website here. https://www.divinetruth.com/www/en/html ... eading.htm
cheers
Teresa

[Cari M]

Hi, Teresa!

Thank you so much for your response and the information that you shared as well. It is nice to have some communication with some like minded people that are familiar with this Divine Love Path.

The other issue that I have been open to from my military service is to not ask anyone for anything, especially any help. I was a type A personality, a woman trying to make it in a man's world so to speak, so I wouldn't allow myself to be perceived as "weak". I have physically hurt myself many times because of this as I did not want to be a burden to anyone.

I am getting better at the physical part and asking for more assistance now, but have yet to feel through that emotion. It really gets triggered when in the teaching that AJ says something along the lines of God is really all we need and we can go straight to her. Which I agree with, but since she doesn't speak to us directly than I would imagine that I would still need to be open to spirit/guide assistance. That means that this Soldier has to be willing to ask for and receive help and love. That is probably more where is stems from....not being loved as a child. My parents were around, but most times doing their own thing and I was left more or less to fend for myself and it just continued from there.

I feel like I am intellectually beginning to realize quite a few things from my childhood, but still am not to feeling them part. It is weird to think all this time that you lived an OK, middle of the road childhood, especially when you look at much worse others have had. But when you become open to the Divine Truth teaching and you have someone from your childhood show up in your life that is now acting like a mirror, it is a whole different reality.

I was wondering what The Life Elysian was, thank you for letting me know about all the resources. I will look into them as well.

Have a great day!

Cari

[Cari M]

Nicky,

Thank you for your response and welcome! It is indeed a nice thing to find others that are familiar with Divine Truth as well.

I am alone almost all the time and enjoy it as it gives me time to work through things. I have truly been blessed with this home as it is a beautiful, peaceful place to live. But it is nice to know that I have the opportunity to reach out now with others that have a similar understanding.

I have a fear of being alone which stems from my childhood, because even though my parents were around, I was pretty much alone. But it is more of a fear of being alone without my soul-mate as opposed to other people, that is definitely an addiction that I need to work on. I pray I can also get to the bottom of that as well, because it is severely hindering me with pursing my relationship with God.

I find it challenging to get to things from my childhood when I cannot recall a memory that would coincide with such feelings. I do understand that a lot of things are projected onto us from our childhood from our parents as well as generational issues, but how to get to some of those things when you can't identify with their thoughts/actions?? I have been asking my mother a lot of questions about when they first got married, her life as a child, and what she knew about my dad's as well. That helps a little bit, but not as much as I was hoping. So how do you feel about something that you don't know about, because it was not your thing in the first place??

Thanks again!

Have a great day!

Cari

[Pierrejoseph]

Hi Cari,

I really enjoyed reading your intro and it touched me deeply, I feel your honesty and desire for truth especially.

The best thing to do when you don't know what it is about that you are suppressing (which is probably actually always the case ), is praying for God to show you, and beware of your law of attraction event in the coming hours and day. It comes in every detail of your every minute daily life, situations, persons you meet, animals you see, spirits etc...When you pray sincerely, it is pretty full on straight to the point and overwhelming. I find it an experiential process to slowly grow my desire for prayer and my "awareness muscle" concerning what God is consistently trying to tell me. And as you, I am pretty closed and resistant, and have been completely blind (almost all painful memories of my of childhood were suppressed all my life). I find really a lot of the work is to pray to feel my blocks to pray sincerely about my suppressed emotions, and then it is actually not that difficult at all where the blocks are gone because there is nothing in the way to feel anymore (or much less is probably more correct to see). The problem are our blocks (false beliefs) about it all. That's the starting point. No desire to release our blocks result in no real work and progression, and often exhaustion and discouragement and many leave the path I feel because a lack of a sincere desire for truth and love. No sincere prayer can come from this place, so much less help and support as well.

I see I have to be patient with myself and more loving with my child within which is in terror. Softening progressively the hard angry facade is part of this process, not intellectually trying to and pushing me into the process, that does not work. Grow you love for self and compassion for self. I feel this might be relevant to you too. As for you, it is hard for me to ask help as I feel weak.

Hope that helps somehow. I find this forum is really a great place get some help from people who have experiences things we have no yet. So you ask and you will receive.

Cheers, Pierre

[Cari M]

Greetings, Pierre!

Thank you for your kind and helpful response. Your words confirm and remind us the principles of Divine Truth and how go to God in all things. The facade truly runs deep for sure...the military has been key for me to learn how to be a subject matter expert in this area unfortunately. Thankfully God NEVER quits on us, no matter what unloving space we are in there is always another minute, hour, day, opportunity to turn ourselves around towards her. Another opportunity to forgive, to repent, to give and receive love. It is a beautiful thing and I send love an encouragement to all my brothers and sisters to keep on pressing.

Have a great day!

Cari

[LauraR]

Hello Cari,
I enjoyed reading your introduction. Although I have not been in the military, I have shut down my emotions (and until recently was quite proud of my "Xena Warrior Princess" facade). I have been divorced for 27 years and most that time on my own,so that tells you how shut down to my soulmate I have been.
I wanted to answer your question about the Life Elysian. It is the second book in the trilogy "written" by Robert James Lees. The first is Through the Mists and the third is The Gates of Heaven. They are wonderful books that tell of life once we pass into spirit and some about the progression through the spheres. They are beautiful and inspiring and have helped me to see spirits as people. After you finish these books you can read the Padgett Messages they are amazing too.
As an aside - I live in Southern California and my daughter went to North Carolina and stayed on the preserve owned by Eustace Conway. He is from the series Mountain Men - maybe you have heard of him? Her experience there was mixed, but she absolutely loves North Carolina. At one point we were thinking about moving there - not so sure now.
Love to you,
Laura

[Cari M]

Hi, Laura!

Thank you for your response! I am going to get these books now as well. I do have the Padgett Messages and it is lovely to see how much love and assistance he received from all the spirits that were working with him.

I am divorced myself for 12 years, so I can clearly relate to that feeling of "doing it on your own" and having to hold it down by yourself, etc. But now we don't have to do that anymore. There is so much love and assistance to be had by all of us...we just have to get to it.

I live in Western NC, near the mountains. Before you give up on NC all together, let me know if you want to come back out this way and I will show you around.

Love to you as well! Enjoy your day!

Cari

[Cari M]

I just read Teresa's post again and followed the link for the free downloads of those books. Thank you! Also thank you to AJ and Mary for providing us with so many resources.