Hello from Amanda

[Amanda]

Hello everyone,
My name is Amanda Webster and I'm from Tasmania, Australia. I'm really happy to have found this forum and decided to stop lurking and join in. I was introduced to Divine Truth about 7 years ago and I could describe my path so far as a bit like a roller coaster, in that I have had some frightening things to face but have also experienced more joy and peace than I have ever felt before. Already my life is so much better than it was before despite my resistance to being humble and allowing God to have a relationship with me.
I have a husband and two adult daughters, one of whom is also on this path. I also have three young grandchildren and they were the initial motivation for my following this way . I wanted them to have better, happier lives than I had had and When I realised how much damage I had done to my family I wanted to put an end to it.
I love doing art, ink and watercolour are my current favourites and I love doing illustrations rather than 'fine art', especially portraits and kids in action. I started dabbling in art about 5 years ago and now I do it almost full time. I sell a bit at markets and at a local craft shop.
I'm also in a gospel choir, since the beginning of this year and it's amazing. We sing a huge variety of gospel songs, some traditional to some very funky stuff with a strong African-American influence. When I'm not concentrating too hard on getting my parts right it really does help me connect to God. I love it!
So.... Thanks Nicky for creating this forum and I look forward to being part of it.

[Nicky]

Hi Amanda

Welcome to the forum. The gospel choir sounds pretty cool - I've lately been listening to some music from that kind of genre/background and it has been really good for my faith and connecting with God too.

Nice to meet you.

Nicky

[LauraR]

Hello Amanda,
It is nice to meet you. I just found Divine Truth about two years ago and definitely feel like I am on a roller coaster - I am glad to hear the ride may smooth out a bit. However, I know that is still my resistance. I have a grown daughter she just recently had her 30th birthday. My initial motivation was not my daughter - in fact I was pretty sure she would think I was crazy once I told her about Divine Truth, Jesus and Mary. But I have learned that I can do so many things to improve her life through feeling my own emotions that she has become a motivator. I am also thinking of future grandchildren and the one I have in spirit.
You know most people look at things backwards - like kids these days! What are they coming to?! And the Divine Truth says it is not the children we have to correct, it is the adults. I am so grateful for finding the path and am hopeful for our children and grandchildren.
May you stay strong in God's love!
Laura

[Amanda]

Thank you Laura and nice to meet you too, across the other side of the world.
I wanted to clarify one thing about the "roller coaster ride smoothing out". Well it just depends of which emotions you tackle first. For me I recognised that my biggest fear was inciting anger in my parents and I was addicted to placating them. As a child they used humiliation, ridicule and threats to control me. I was fearful of them and just about any other thing that moved! As I grew older I began to feel resentful, angry and quite hopeless about the situation.
From the very first DVD I watched about divine truth I knew without a doubt that this was my biggest issue. I knew the situation had to change but I was terrified about it. I forced myself to confront my mother and the result was catastrophic, just as I knew it would be. My whole family became involved and then started two years of intense fear and shame. Then came anger which I'm very resistive to feeling but as I allow myself to feel it the grief is finally coming out now and it's five years since that first confrontation with my mother.
Feeling controlled by another person is a terrible thing and for me not to have that anymore is amazing. I'm so grateful, excited, surprised and delighted about the way my life has changed...and l really feel a better person inside because of it.
So what I want to say is choose the biggest, scariest emotion first and then your life will improve immeasurably and you will have a whole lot more faith in youself, God and the process of feeling and releasing emotion and instead of forcing yourself to do scary things you will actually welcome the opportunity.
Just writing this is making me feel such gratitude to AJ and Mary for their teaching. And I really want to encourage everyone to listen to what they say and just do it because even if you make mistakes along the way, get off the path, just get back on and start over again. If you make what they say a priority in your life then your life will change for the better.

[LauraR]

Hello again,
I think we are in somewhat the same place regarding our families. Although I hadn't learn of Divine Truth yet - about 5 years ago I basically told my mother I wasn't going to give her what she wanted anymore - she was controlling, manipulating and was really wishing bad things for me in order to maintain her control. She went too far one day - and I told her the truth - although it was not done in a loving way. Since then my family is not talking to me - they too tried to get me to behave. I wish I had been more loving but I believe it would have ended the same way. Now the issue is that although my mother is not in my life - I am still attracting angry woman and the manipulations are much more subtle - so I have some work to do there still. That and I still have guilt and shame regarding my behavior to work through - understanding that those feelings are probably error. I have felt some freedom but not a lot. I spent the last couple of days studying the videos about deconstructing the facade (again) and am working to tear down the walls.
I love being able to talk to people around the world and I imagine your really cool accent.
Love to you,
Laura