How and where do you express your anger?

[Natalie]

I am looking for ways how can I process through the emotion of frustration.
I live in a block of flats and so I don´t want to be disrespectful to people around: my family and neighbours. I think I could somehow connect to it in a forrest but my question is how.
In general I have trouble processing the emotion of anger. I find it uncomfortable. I often finish up expressing anger of spirits (that is pointless of course).
I feel stuck in my life and I feel anger is a layer to start with.
Does anyone of you have any ideas?

[Maxine]

Hi Natalie,

Anger is an emotion I have huge blocks in allowing. There are strong reasons from my childhood why, but I have asked the same question you have asked and what I realised was that my LOA ie the place I live with close neighbours around me was also telling me I actually don't want to feel the anger, even though I now acknowledge on some level there is a big ball of it in me. I feel that when I really want to feel it, I will find a way or attract a situations/places where I can express it lovingly.

I receive youtube updates about new Divine Truth clips and some of Maureen's have been very guided and appropriate for me as no matter how much I want to skip the anger my guides are showing me I can't. The latest clips Maureen has edited are all from the the 2009 talk "Anger is your guide."

I think that whole talk (on DT website) may help you as it gives ways for you to examine your anger issues, how to feel it, techniques to use and any denial/ fears/ false beliefs you may have about feeling your anger and some great examples from the audience and Mary and Jesus.

Maxine

[maureen]

Hi Natalie....a few things that work for me are tying a knot on the end of a tee shirt and using that to hit a chair (a piece of hose or pool noodles work too)....also, writing down the true feeling I have when I am angry....without inhibition. I try to let out yells and screams when I can as well...in my car...into pillows...in nature...or in my house. It seems like taking advantage of the moment (when the rage surfaces) is the best.

Just creating space and having some tools around and ready for when you feel rage boiling up....is the way to go....so you don't have to try to manage that when you feel the anger coming to the surface.

Love,
Maureen

[Amanda Stracey]

Hi Natalie

I'm focusing on your comments about the difficulties of wanting to acknowledge or express anger or looking at what we are doing or the choices we are making to keep the anger locked up.

I've found it very helpful to notice how I feel when kids are acting out or having a tantrum in public. That usually helps me feel what judgments and beliefs I have about being angry in public. In fact I've found I can't escape that anyway when I'm out and about. I've assumed that I'm imposing those same judgments on myself. I also have developed some bodily symptoms when I've bottled up my anger or the shame and embarrassment emotions on top of it. I developed some red sore skin on my face and spots and boils. That was quite motivating as I suppose it was " as clear as the nose on my face" that something was going on.

There are quite a few videos in the emotions section of the faq channel that might be useful as well. I'll add them when I'm able.

Regards

Amanda

[Natalie]

Thank you for your responses. Yes I noticed Maureens new uploads yesterday and took a look at them, they are from Anger is Your Guide. I watched it years ago. Today I rewatched some parts and found it helpful.

Thanks a lot to Josh especially for his bravery to process publicaly. I too have issues with my mom, though it is different in my case, I could relate to this bubbling feeling inside. My trouble is I have been very reactive and TERRIBLY yelling at her, even more times a day, and it has become my habit. It has been mosly spirits yelling through me but anyway, it came through my mouth. I am choosing to stop this and rather feel my discomfort. In the past I tried several times to run into my bedroom and punch the bed with the pillow and/or scream into the pillow. But in most cases I didn´t get underneath, because it was still spirits and not me. I often feel pressure at the back of my head, which is the place where spirits connect to us (and btw I have been heavily spirit influenced in various ways).
Lately I don´t yell at my mom far not so much as in the past. But I still have need to feel my repentance about that so that I never do it again.

The reason why I am angry currently is mainly my general situation. And there is a lot of fear being confronted. And I am largely resistive to fear as well and so I feel heavy. And lately I have cramping.
And if I wasn´t so resistive to fear maybe I wouldn´t be in so much anger. But anyway, I do have anger as well related to feeling invaded and not having proper boudaries and it was caused in my childhood I feel. And I feel very angry and frustrated about so many things. And angry that I am still angry and somehow unable to process through it.

While writing this post and trying to concentrate my mom came into our bedroom and started telling me what she thinks I should do in my life. I said "you don´t respect my privacy, please let me alone." She did and when she closed the door I tried to scream into the pillow (because I feel bottled up and irritable). She heard it, took it personally, returned and said she´s going to go outside. She got offended that I never want to talk to her.
I realised afterwards that sending her away was unloving because we share our bedroom. (And by the way I am still financially dependent on her. - but it is very much her creation I would say.)

Anyway, I actually consider posting here to assistance section once I form it. I feel distressed and quite intense and don´t quite know what to do. I desire to start being self-responsible.

[Nicky]

Hi Natalie

After reading your latest post, I felt it a good idea to link you to the following thread:

viewtopic.php?f=30&t=919

You may find benefit in some of the feedback Eloisa gifted on the thread in relation to issues with parents (when we are living with them), particularly point number 5 which I have quoted below:

5. You are choosing to not take self responsibility for your emotions and current living conditions, wanting to blame your mum and draw others in to ‘agree’ with you that your mum is in the ‘wrong’.

The above may assist in your self reflections/something to consider in relation to your latest post.

Also, Eloisa shared more in the above thread concerning the area of taking personal responsibility which you may find helpful - however I will leave that for you to feel about and determine what information applies to your current situation.

Cheers
Nicky